Ivan Blanton (@zaphod4prezzie)

Hunter Biden: "Hello, Daddy?" Daddy Joe: "Yes son, what is it this time?" Hunter Biden: "I want to be the ambassador to Ukraine." Daddy Joe: "Son, why do you want to be the ambassador to Ukraine?" Hunter Biden: "Well, an ambassador makes a lot of money. I can also get a larger amount in kickbacks from the Ukraine government, if I'm an ambassador." Daddy Joe: "Son, there's a lot more to being an ambassador than you think." Hunter Biden: "I can meet and greet people. That's what they do mostly." Daddy Joe: (Sighs heavily) "Then go be a Walmart greeter. Son, you're not fit to be an ambassador, and that's that." Hunter Biden: (Starts crying and whining) "But Daddy, I need the money for child support for that woman in Arkansas!" Daddy Joe: "You need to learn how to keep that thing in your pants!" Hunter Biden: "But Daddy, if I do that, how am I supposed to go pee?"